Jen is a New Orleans-born, Florida-bred individual whose biggest claim to fame is that Norm MacDonald kissed her on the mouth. She’s obsessed with the ‘90s and doesn’t understand why people don’t “get it” when she tells them "Can’t Hardly Wait" is the most underrated movie of all time.
She runs to allow more chocolate and beer to enter her body without eliciting as much guilt from her mind. Her kitchen remains untouched from roughly January to September, and is an absolute mess and haven for baked goods between October and December. She watches the Scripps National Spelling Bee the way normal Americans watch the Super Bowl.
Jen is marrying a truer Gryffindor than she on 12/13/14 and is already annoyed with how much wedding-related things cost. Follow her Twitter ramblings at @jenislosingit and laughable attempts at being healthy and fit at She's also on Pinterest.
Age: 29
What I Do, Job-wise: Technical Writer by day, freelance writer/editor by night 
What I Do, Fun-wise: I spend an obscene amount of time with my cat and an even more obscene amount of time at Walt Disney World. I love board games, trying new restaurants, horror movies, musicals, horror movie musicals, correcting people’s grammar, avoiding big dogs, and Googling things like blue waffle and harlequin baby just to prove to myself I can still handle it.
My Motto: “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” – Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
My Anti-Motto: “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.” Bitch, you have obviously never had Nutella.
The First Movie Star I Ever Had A Crush On: Robin Hood…the Disney fox version, not the Kevin Costner or Cary Elwes version. There’s a reason they made him a fox, amirite? And I’ll see myself out.
My “celebs to make out with” list: This could get out of hand, so I’ll limit it to five: Cillian Murphy, Joshua Jackson, Paul Rudd, Joel McHale, and Taylor Hanson (come at me). Bonus: Scarlett Johansson. I don’t think I’d enjoy it, but my fiancé would, and I love him enough to give him hypothetical gifts. Plus, considering how long my actual back-ups list is, I owe him one.
The Most Played Song On My iTunes: “Got You (Where I Want You)” by The Flys. I’m the queen of one-hit wonders from 1995 to 2000.
Last Book I Read Without Skimming Any Parts: "Gone Girl" by Gillian Flynn
My Most Worn Item of Clothing: Flip-flops. I live in Florida so I avoid continually wearing things that make me sweaty (i.e. everything else.)
Beauty Products That I Hoard: Nude and brown eye shadows, things that will make my hair less frizzy (i.e. Bumble and bumble. Does It All), curling/flat irons, and Revlon Just Bitten Kissable Balm Stains. I used to hoard scrunchies, but a few charitable girlfriends of mine saw to their destruction. In 2008.
I smell like: 1998, obviously. Not because I haven’t showered since then, but because that pink Herbal Essences shampoo is back and forcing me to pay more than it’s worth because I’m a product of the nostalgia machine.
Have I ever faked an orgasm: I have a lot of Slytherin in me. Translation: I don’t give out participation awards.